There are a lot of things to think about before moving in with someone, and it’s important to be aware of them all. You may have known this person or been dating them a while, and you may think you know everything there is to know, but there are some big differences between living together and just spending time together.
For one thing, when you’re living together, you’re sharing not just space but also finances, bills, food, and pretty much everything else. This can lead to tension if you’re not both on the same page about what you expect from each other. Let’s consider a few things you should consider before taking the plunge and moving in with your significant other or potential roommate.
Good old finances
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Do you have joint bank accounts? How do you plan on handling bills and expenses? Who is going to be responsible for what? It’s important to be on the same page about money before moving in together because it can be a big source of conflict.
Regardless of whether the person is a significant other, financial expectations can still be a big issue to contend with. Money is often said to be one of the leading causes of stress and conflict in relationships, so it’s best to get everything out in the open before things get too complicated.
If one of you doesn’t have enough money to contribute to rent, for example, that person may feel like a burden. On the other hand, if one person is always shelling out money for groceries or other shared expenses, they may start to feel taken advantage of.
It’s important to clearly understand each other’s financial situation and what you’re both comfortable with before moving in together.
Are you both neat freaks or slobs?
This one is actually really important. If you’re a neat freak and your roommate partner is a bit of a slob, chances are you’re going to butt heads on this issue pretty regularly. It’s important to be honest with yourself (and your partner) about how tidy you both are before moving in together.
If one person is constantly cleaning up or picking up after the other, it will get old quickly. On the other hand, if the place is always a mess and neither of you is willing to clean it up, it’s going to be a constant source of frustration.
It’s important to find a middle ground that you’re both comfortable with, or at least be willing to compromise on this issue. Otherwise, it could lead to some serious tension down the road.
Who is this person really?
Many people have to move in with roommates they don’t know that well. But how do you know if someone is truly trustworthy? Oftentimes, it is best to live with someone you already know or have at least met in person.
If you’re moving in with a complete stranger, you should do a few things to ensure they’re not hiding anything. First of all, do a background check. You don’t necessarily need to use a service. Just Google them, check their socials, and maybe make sure they don’t have any mugshots online.
You should also try to get to know the person as much as possible before moving in with them. Ask them about their life, family, hobbies, etc. The more you know about someone, the easier it will be to trust them.
Are you prepared for the worst?
No one likes to think about the most horrible of worst-case scenarios, but it’s important to be prepared for them nonetheless. What if your partner or roommate suddenly decides to move out? What if they stop paying their share of the rent or bills? What if they start acting strange, and you’re not sure why?
It’s important to have a plan if you run into these eventualities. Make sure you know where you would stand financially if your partner or roommate moves out. Make sure you have several backup plans for how you would make ends meet. And most importantly, make sure you know how to reach out for help if things start to go south.
Moving in with someone is a big decision, and it’s not one that should be taken lightly. There are a lot of things to consider before taking the plunge. But if you’re prepared and you’ve thought things through, it can be a really great experience. Just make sure you’re doing it for the right reasons.